Psychologist, writer and entrepreneur Dmitry Soroka identified the main women’s claims, which should be avoided.
Psychologist, writer and entrepreneur Dmitry Soroka identified the main female claims to be avoided, reports Rus.Media.
If you do not know how to negotiate and talk with other people, then most likely, you are either living in constant conflict, or even worse, live alone. From a simple spark easily burns the flame. And from the ridiculous and empty claims are born of divorce and separation.
When we talk about competent relationship – a relationship without pretensions. No, of course we are all human and can be something and someone unhappy, but the form and content of the discontent require constant adjustment. You know, like in business: if there are objections and the claim to a colleague, suggest correct action. There is no right option, then why say “how not” if “as necessary”, you don’t know? A special place in the list of women’s complaints is not having any information, moral, spiritual and other meanings. Claims that are more similar to some form of protection or a way of attracting further attention. Why is this so? From a lack of simple skills and basic communication. We don’t know what to do to capture the attention of your partner. In the end, though, curve is an emotional form of attracting attention is the claim. She touches her hear even if it is off topic. But that’s the price she pays for this way of attention or protection is not pleasant.
Claims that will lead to divorce
— An important choice: either we learn to negotiate either choose the path of non-empty and useless claims. “A bad influence on you your friends.” Perhaps this claim will give the result? He will throw them, will cease to communicate? No. His friends has nothing to do with it. Any man will never refuse friends, that it is still a bad influence. Often many girls are asking to remove the former from all social networks. Why? To show that you’re jealous and can’t handle your affection? To show that the former has a much more influence than you? This is obviously an empty and meaningless claim.
More from the category of ridiculous claims – it’s “I told you, you got it all wrong”. This is the beginning of the end of any relationship. Men tend to make mistakes, and another reminder will only cause anger and irritation.
“Do you hear me” – is generally a direct contentious. He has no ears? Is. “Do you hear me” sounds in the ears of the man as “You’re nothing without me can not. You’re young and stupid.” And he’s not. Otherwise, why would you with this generally linked fate. So you know nothing of men? Then it is not he hears not, and you just don’t know how to choose smart men.
“Drop the habit” is a classic. Remember the movie “Love and pigeons”? As the main heroine of this movie (women) struggled with the habits of men? One was not fond of pigeons, and the second fought with the alcoholism of her grandfather Matunuska. And in the end neither the one nor the other did not work with the claim “drop the habit” influence. Through the bans will never work to achieve anything.
Today I notice that in many families there is absolutely no culture of communication. Over time, we’re not worried about telling a close person and how. We are absolutely not interested in the meaning of words and how we speak. Indeed, in most cases, the claims are absolutely empty of content, and the best way to bring mutual understanding in a relationship is to withdraw from the unnecessary and pointless accusations.
The opinion of men
Nicholas, 37 years old, forwarder
“When you fill the fridge?” These words I hear from my wife every time I come into the apartment after work. Perhaps it’s not an empty claim, but by using scandals and cries never to achieve anything. I grew up in a military family. Father was constantly on business trips, exercises, and mother was engaged in farming. Dad came tired, they were out of uniform, and the kitchen was waiting for his favorite fried carp with potatoes and cranberry pie. Of course, this ideal relationship. I became an officer and chose a woman who does not like to stand at the stove. To change it is unlikely that it will succeed. Believe me, after the phrase “When you fill the fridge?”, said reproachfully, do not want to run with a shopping bag for groceries. On the contrary, thinking myself to upload work less to be home.
Ivan, 35 years old, pediatrician
“You think you can earn?” I married the third year of medical school. Remember that all relatives of his wife rejoiced in my future career. Supposedly, the doctor is always to feed a family. Perhaps it is related to the surgeon, but not to the pediatrician. After my first paycheck my husband pouted and sarcastically snorted. Then it started. Every day my wife started to roll out a list of the necessary things that short of money. She further demanded a career change. Slipped me the job medical sales representatives. I like to treat children. Maybe she needs to lower the bar. For example, instead of iPhone you can buy phone easier. Anyway, the understanding we have found. Agreed in one thing: we should break up.
Igor, 50 years old, entrepreneur
“You can say that again: the right to speak – put”. Chose the wife of a scholar, affects more than 25 years. Endless edits not made me a competent person. In the Russian language in the school was a solid three, but in mathematics and physics, I was not equal. Here is the result: started a business, began to earn good money. Wife will not please. Just start telling interesting stories, so my wife just pokes in the nose the rules of grammar. Once has not sustained and began to test and the exact Sciences. So the wife couldn’t remember the formula for Newton’s second law. What is more important to know how to use a particular verb or basic physics? Maybe both. If you yourself is far from ideal, why make the claim to others. Perfection itself!